Interesting SMEs

Plumb your experience for a moment:  what are the strangest or most interesting experiences you've ever had working with a SME?

• Discovering that your SME - a genius in his field - could not write a complete sentence.
• Being told by an editor (after submitting a completed course) that approximately 50% of the content sent by the SME drew major hits on Safe Assign (i.e,, appears to have been plagiarized - from 8 different sources).
• Having 90% of a completed course submitted to you in a single spreadsheet - that's content for 10 week-long units, in a 50-column spreadsheet.
• Having a SME for a history class tell you that she would be out of the country for 2 weeks while teaching Fashion Design to the Saudi royal family.
• Having the scripts for 90-minutes of model role plays dictated to you over the phone because the SME is "blocked" when he sits down to write.  (Thankfully, I had access to audio recording and transcript capabilities.)
• Holding a remote course review meeting with a SME who is sitting in a hospital emergency room, waiting for a diagnosis on her husband.
• Having a SME completely disappear for two weeks in the middle of your project - with no warning, no responses to phone calls or e-mails.

Got any of your own you'd be willing to share?